It’s kind of still growing on me. I don’t feel strongly about any particular track yet.
You like the way I look? I like walking to the train without you telling me what you think about how I look. Don’t be that guy.
Still doing an awful job at this #100daysofgratitude thing. Day 12: I’ve been able to do so many cool things because Bake and Destroy fans have supported my goofiness over the years. Last Halloween I baked on TV dressed as Roddy Piper, and Teno and I met Svengoolie! It doesn’t get much better than that. Thanks, you guys.
I’m making and selling INTRAMURAL ZOMBIE HUNTER tees again. This used to be one of my biggest sellers (even rivaling I’m Fat Let’s Party at times), but overwhelming demand and panic attacks and mismanagement caused me to fall behind on a lot of orders for them.
I run a considerably tighter ship these days, so they’re back on. Why are they so good?
- Each one comes with your own custom name and number. I use a professional grade heat press and athletic lettering just like you’d get for your company softball league. You can get a nickname or even a short phrase.
- Custom hand-applied gore, as much or as little as you want. This is the reason this shirt has often been copied but will never be copied 100%, because no one else cares enough to do this. I use a special blend of printing inks that are permanent, washer safe, and not too thick, so the shirt stays comfy. I even take special gore requests.
I have one and it’s great!
To the undoubtedly comfortable white person who did this to my friend’s salon,
This is Salon Tress, it belongs to my friend Tressa. She recently relocated her business to Logan Square from Albany Park in the hopes of increasing foot traffic and also, to be closer to Humboldt Park where she has lived for more than the eight years I have known her. Tressa’s husband Andy is a recent college grad. He is also legally blind, so they rely on income from the salon to do things like pay bills and buy food for their son Baron, who is a year older than my son Teno. Things are not easy for Tressa as a small business owner, but even as she struggles to make ends meet she continues to offer hair cuts and styling at extremely reasonable prices. She even cut my hair for free when I was unemployed so I would look nice on interviews. So when you scrawled what I’m sure you thought was a super cool statement against the gentrification of Logan Square on the front door of her salon, you really fucked up. See, Tressa provides affordable services to the people in Logan Square who actually live on a budget. As I am sure you went to that Starbucks on the corner either immediately before or after writing on my friend’s business’ door, you probably have extra money to spend on cleaning graffiti off your door, but she doesn’t. Most people who struggle, the people who you have made the most pathetic effort to defend with your dumb act of vandalism, don’t have time to write shit on doors because they are at their jobs, working incredibly hard to make a living. Working hard like Tressa does. So, while I doubt you will see this post, know that if you fall in a hole and die it’s because I wished that on you, because you are an awful person. And to everyone else in Logan Square, please book an appointment at @salon_tress because Tressa is a great person and, contrary to what her front door may indicate, she is not pushing anyone out of their homes, but rather, she is trying to scratch out a living doing what she loves. Thank you. #chicago #logansquare #salon #hair
I see a lot of memes encouraging people to work out and whatnot, and that’s great - except I don’t need encouragement to push myself. I need encouragement to not push so hard. I need #chillspiration - so I made this. Hit the snooze, you’re always early anyway. The bed is a perfect temperature and your dog is being so cute. Just roll over and go back to sleep. #relax #sleep #meme